I’m fascinate by how Reality TV shows empower and transform people. Whether it’s winning a singing competition (American Idol and The Voice) or staying alive in dangerous conditions while food deprived (Naked and Afraid and Survivor) watching others strive, struggle and overcome inner and outer challenges is entertaining and inspiring. What makes these shows so compelling is the fierce commitment displayed by the show’s stars. There’s no way out but through.
You don’t need to be a reality TV star to say YES to your life. Right now you can make an internal commitment to what you want in your life and vow to face your own inner and outer challenges.
Saying YES generates energy, opens the power that is available to you in the present moment and allows you to take action. It’s the first step you need to take to harmonize the dance of your life with the song in your heart and flow with grace, beauty and ease. When you say yes to life you see your circumstances in a new light. Your thoughts, emotions, beliefs and actions start to align with that light energy. You’re able to stand for what you want, which propels you forward towards your dreams and attracts what you need to succeed.
There’s an ancient Cherokee legend that says inside each of us are a pair of wolves, a good wolf and a bad wolf fighting for domination. The good wolf represents joy, calm, love, peace, hope, abundance, compassion, generosity, kindness, and freedom —all the positive attributes that make us feel fabulous. It’s the inner voice of truth that says YES to life’s possibilities.
The other wolf is the exact opposite. This bad boy is the voice of scarcity, fear, self-doubt, self-loathing, insecurity and envy. This wolf comes from our old reptilian brain that urges us to stay small and safe.
Which wolf wins? The one YOU feed.
Which wolf wins? The one YOU feed.
Winning the inner battle between our good and bad wolves isn’t easy. If you’ve spent years feeling defeated, desperate and depressed getting your good wolf to howl takes practice and patience. If being a NO is your default mode disrupting it is uncomfortable. You can feel like a caged bird. Freedom and flying into the unknown are scary, so you stay put standing on your perch feeding yourself the same seeds day after day.
As an entrepreneur and author (I recently finished writing a new book with my husband, The Diabetic and The Dietitian.) I face fear and uncertainty every day. Confronting obstacles and challenges, being creative, putting myself out into the world in a big way, trying failing and trying again are all part of a day’s work.
My bad wolf begs for food all the time. When it does I slow down, take a few deep breaths, cultivate inner calm and refuse to feed it. I practice self-compassion by offering myself care and connection and remember that 99% of fear is in my head. I remind myself that I’m safe and that failure is not the outcome, it’s an essential part of the journey. Oh and I let go of the need to be perfect.
[pullquote align=”full” cite=”” link=”” color=”” class=”” size=””]Drop the idea of becoming someone, because you are already a masterpiece. You cannot be improved. You have only to come to it, to know it, to realize it. —Osho[/pullquote]
I also use powerful tools and practices that I’ve cultivated over the years to shift and raise my vibrational frequency so that my life can become happier and more positive and fulfilling. Instead of feeding fear and despair (which vibrate at a low frequency) I practice self-love and engage in activities that foster gratitude, abundance and joy. (To order my special kit to learn how to powerfully shift your mood click HERE.)
Here’s a practice I use with my clients to help them embrace the YES mindset. I highly recommend you try it for one day and see where it takes you.
Pick one area of your life where you feel stuck or afraid. Consider where you’re blocked or shut down. (Something should pop into your consciousness right away.) Next write down all you troubles about this issue. Don’t censor or judge yourself. Just let the worries, negative thoughts, confusion, fear and frustration flow onto the page.
This is your opportunity to observe your bad wolf talking so you can distinguish it from your good wolf. Write down what it says: “I’ll never be successful, this can’t possibly work, I’m not smart enough, I’m no good, I can’t deal with failure…” Don’t worry, noticing the voice will not empower it. It will enable you to be more mindful so that you can stop feeding it.
Now close your eyes, relax and take a few deep breaths. Notice what arises, as you get quiet and calm. Let the voice of the positive wolf talk. That’s your intuitive wisdom. What does it say? “Yes I can do this. I’m strong and capable. I’m worthy and loved. I trust the universe. I’m here for a reason. Taking a risk is less risky than staying put. I’m not sure how this is all going to work out, but I want to go for it.”
For one day observe your thoughts and feelings. Notice how you feel when your good wolf speaks verses when your bad wolf does.
When you feel ready to have a breakthrough, get clear about what you want. Then write down exactly what you desire in large, bold handwriting. Fill in the blank:
I commit to having a YES in_____
If you want to be a YES in your life demand it! Writing your YES down creates an opening for the light to emerge and your inner happy wolf to howl at all you’re accomplishing and achieving.
Need help learning to say YES to your life? Click HERE to apply for a Compass Coaching Session